The adventures of Lily
by Windwalker
Summary: Lily was just a schoolgirl living her humdrum life until one day she fell into the world of One Piece, fell in love with a certain cook and found out she was the daughter of an infamous pirate. Romance and parody. Well irritated bored writer failing at writing parody. You have been warned.


Delilah Misty Dream D. Law Star could never have imagined such a thing to happen to her of all people. One day she was just a teenage girl going to school and the next a strange man dressed like in a suit had slung a bag over her head and kidnapped her! At first she had dreaded that the suited man had a less then gentlemanly intention for her but when the bag was removed from her head he had apologised profusely. Looking it his wide earnest gaze set in a gorgeously handsome face melted her heart and she couldn't be angry at him.

"That's OK. My name is Delilah, but my friends call me Lily. What's your name?"

"Lily-chan! Such a beautiful name. I'm Sanji."

Sanji kissed her hand and swung her around causing Lily to laugh out loud.

"I'm so sorry I had to accost such a beautifully young maiden as yourself but you see your life is in danger."

"Danger?!" Lily asked curiously. "Why would I be in danger? I'm just a sixteen year old school girl"

"Lily-chwan, you didn't know? You're the daughter of a Pirate. He sent you away to protect you. Your life was threatened by his enemy and he wanted to hide you from harm."

"A pirate? I'm the daughter of a pirate? I was adopted, but I never knew that. Sounds exciting. What's my father like?"

Her knight in shining lapels lit the cigarette he had put between his lips, took a drag and blew smoke out again as he stood thoughtfully.

"Your father. Your father is a very powerful man. He's got red hair and a scar over one eye. He's what we call a Yonkou. One of four emperors of the sea. His name is Shanks."

Lily's eye brightened as Sanji told her. Her real father sounded like a strong man. She hoped she could meet him.

"Can I meet him?"

Sanji shook his head.

"It's too dangerous right now. That's why I'm here. I've come to take you to my ship so my Captain and our crew can protect you."

"Are pirates real here then? And ships and captains and crew? Next you'll tell me your Captain is called Jack Sparrow."

"Who?" Sanji asked looking cutely confused.

"He's from a film. This place? I take it you don't have films here? How did you take me from my world to here anyway?"

"I've never heard of a "film" Lily-chan. And there is only one world here. I hope I didn't hurt you by accident? Oh no! I would be devastated if I hurt you in any way my shimmering Miss!"

Lily stared at Sanji thoroughly confused until she realised at some point she had changed clothes. Lily looked down on herself and gasped in delight at the threads hugging her body. She was wearing blue pants with light blue frills down the sides. A white silk scarf around her waist. And a pale pink blouse and wearing thick leather boots. On top of her head she also found a cute little white hat that covered her golden locks that were tied back in flowing blue ribbon. Her mismatched green and gold eyes lit up.

"You look so cute, Lily-chwan!" Sanji's she noticed was looking at her lovingly with hearts in his eyes. She couldn't help but blush a little at the attention he gave her. He really was quite handsome looking. Maybe this was a dream? Lily had always wanted to be swept off her feet by a gorgeous male and here she was with said dreamboat. If this was a dream she never wanted to wake up.

"Thank you for rescuing me. I would very much like to meet your crew."

"Of course my butter cream. Anything you ask"

Before Lily could react, Sanji had swept her off her feet again (swoon) holding her in his warm but gentle hands and then they were off like the wind. Lily close her eyes in bliss as she felt the ground beneath then whiz by as Sanji's strong arms held her close. It was most exhilarating. Before she knew it she heard a soft thud of wood and opened her to find herself on the deck of a ship. The decking was curiously mostly made of grass. As Sanji set her down she twirled about to admire the decor. A swing set swung idly against a tree of all things and there were two stunning staircases spirally behind to an upper area. She was awed.

(At this point the writer had stopped to do other things over the next few days before returning to the story. After reading over what she had written already she realised, she was actually writing this almost seriously when it was meant to be a quick intentionally badly written parody. So from this point, the writer will try and refrain from taking this on as a too serious project.)

Then chaos erupted as Luffy ran out onto the deck being chased by the sound of Nami's angry voice. The Strawhat pirate barely stopped to say hi to Lily before he laughingly jumped the ship. Of course a blue nosed reindeer known as Chopper who had been quietly grinding medicine saw Luffy jump and screeched out the Captain's name before diving in after him. Lily barely had time to take that in when a Green haired man grumbled out something less savoury and dived in after them both. Sanji muttered his own expletive to the mess. Lily stopped still, staring wide eyed before suddenly lifting off into a laugh that made her curl over herself.

"Your crew is certainly interesting" she said

"You don't know the half of it" he said

Zolo pulled the bedraggled pair of Devil fruit users and dumped them on the deck. Glaring at the pair the entire time.

"Bakas" He said

Shishishi Luffy laughed

"It seemed a good idea at the time."

"Oy Luffy" Sanji barked at the Captain causing the soaking boy to glance towards his new guests.

"Hey again. You're pretty."

Lily blushed at the compliment

"Don't say that in front of Nami, Luffy" Zolo warned him. "I'm not saving your life twice today."

"Oh" Lily replied quietly. "Are you and this Nami.. Erm, together then?"

"Yes we are. We have lots of sex too."

Sanji charged at his Captain and kicked him over the side. Lily heard a splash as he fell into the Ocean.

"NEVER TALK ABOUT NAMI THAT WAY SHIT-HEAD!"

"Ero-Cook don't think for one second I'm diving in there again. That's on you." Zolo stood up shook water from his hair and sauntered off, but not before appraising Lily with his one eye causing her to shudder.

Later that day Lily was sat around the dining table and watching with horror as the crew consumed the food like ravenous beasts. Well most of the male crew that was. Lily was thankful to be sitting next to the tall woman who had introduced herself as Nico Robin. Despite Lily's initial wariness the Archaeologist had proven to be a nice person. And she was almost delicate in the way she ate. So at least the only food that splattered on her own plate was minimal.

Lily winced when Nami smacked the back of Luffy's head. Not that the boy cared in the least as he shoved his eleventh steak into his full mouth. Lily on meeting Nami had felt a little jealous at how beautiful Nami looked with her long red hair. But the navigator fiery but fun personality like Robin had won her over. In fact everyone she met had been rather nice if eccentric. Usopp had told her fun stories that made her laugh, Franky had cried when he learned how lily was adopted and never knew Shanks. And Brook had been very polite, even when he asked to see her panties. Nami had put the skeleton in his place though. Chopper was sweet, Luffy was hilarious, Zoro was a little scary but everyone else was airtight with him and she doubted such people would hang around if Zoro was really that evil. And then there was her hero, Sanji. Gorgeous, Adonis like figure Sanji. Lily couldn't help but sneak little glances at him and wonder how soft his hair really was. And he was always complimenting her.

"You could ask him."

Lily startled at the sudden voice and looked to see Robin looking back.

"Ask him?" She mumbled.

"Yes of course. Sanji doesn't bite. If you like him just ask. He's very much a gentlemen when he's not over-reacting."

"I couldn't. I've only just met him and all of you. And my life is in danger. I don't want to make things awkward."

"Hmmm" Robin said. "You don't need to worry about that. I've learned being on this crew that awkward is just another way to have fun. "

"No snogging at the table!. I'm trying to eat here" Zoro groused as he glared at Nami and Luffy who had at some point locked lips. Nami blushed but threw her plate at the swordsman without removing her lips. Luffy just ignored him.

"See." Robin smiled enigmatically. "Sanji-san I would like another ice tea please."

"Right away Robin-swan!"

"Here's your chance." and Robin winked at Lily. Lily shuffled in her seat.

"Here you are my Robin-chwan. An Iced Tea just as you like it."

"Thank you Sanji-san"

"Miss Lily would you care for something? I am at your beck and call"

Lily blushed a deep crimson, shying away from Sanji's open smile.

"I would like to ask you something. Would you? Would you be my boyfriend"

Sanji's face lit up like the fourth of July and before Lily could react he pulled her from her chair spun her around the room and kissed her full on the lips.

"YES. I will be your boyfriend!"

Lily almost fainted at the rush of blOod to her head. She didn't even notice the rest of the room had gone silent until she tipped her head and saw eight smiling faces looking back at her.

"Sanji Bro don't waste time. This is SUPER Exciting! YOW!"

Before they could celebrate the new couple there was a load boom and the ship tilted violently to the side.

"WE'RE UNDER ATTACK! USSOPS AND CHILDREN TO THE LIFE BOATS FIRST!"

There was a scramble and the Strawhats bounded off to tackle the attackers head on. Sanji noticed how scared Lily had become.

"Don't worry Lily-Chan. This is normal. But I'll protect you."

Lily held onto Sanji tight, snuggling into his warmth.

It turned out the attackers were some Marines led by a gnome faced Captain. They were pretty easy to defeat. (Yes the writer at this point has gotten so bored with the story I'm skipping chunks. Time to get to the meat of it. Luffy: "MEAT")

It also turned out the Marines had heard about Lily and the attack was an attempt to grab her to use her against Shanks. Lily was both terrified and exhilarated but Sanji's ever present company and the Crews assurances helped ease her worries. This was nothing like high school where the most dangerous thing was getting caught by the teachers for making out in the car park.

News of Lily's whereabouts had travelled fast and mutual consent of the crew was to hide out on one of the nearby islands. When they got there Sanji was adamant in staying with Lily. Which was more then fine by her. Zoro and Robin also agreed to stay aboard to look out for her. But most everyone knew this was just an excuse for the couple to hang out more. After all it's natural for the two best looking characters to get together for… reasons of aesthetics.

Despite her concern Nami had gone after Luffy when he jumped ship to run off and explore. Al the while she grumbled about the baka and how she wondered how she hooked up with someone so immature. But then she remembered how he had given her his hat and that had cemented the relationship because relationships are always based on sharing hats. Franky did try and point out that others had also held onto Luffy's hat and technically they should make them in a relationship with the Strawhat but they laughed. It had to be Nami as Robin was already hooked up with Zoro by the time Nami and Luffy realised they had feelings for each other. Frankly though the others were relieved. Sanji liked women, Usopp had someone else in mind (and wasn't considered good looking enough for Nami), Chopper wasn't interested in humans and Brook was a walking skeleton.

"Hey why not you and Luffy, Franky?"

"I'm hentai, Chopper. Hentai. I can't be pinned down by one person."

Besides Nami and Luffy. Franky, Chopper, Usopp and Brook also went on the island to gather supplies. And were a mere foot note after that as this story is meant to be the romance between an OC and Sanji and the good looking older pair of Zoro and Robin and Nami being female had to be hitched and only Luffy was considered important enough for her. But let's forget those guys for now and wrap this story up!

Whilst Robin and Zoro were making out, Sanji was treating Lily to his most amazing dishes for her to try. Lily had never tasted food any better then that. And for a few hours that was what they did until a shout came calling.

"Guys! Guys!"

Sanji's lady sonar went ping.

"Nami-chan?"

Those on the ship went up on deck only to nearly tumble back down as Luffy landed with Nami in his arms. Nami looked afraid.

"The island is crawling with Marines. I think they know where we are. We sent the others to spy on them and agreed to reconvene later on another part of the island but I think we really need to move now!"

Things went hectic after that. But before they could lift anchor and move elsewhere a fleet of Marine ships had appeared over the horizon and next they knew they were being boarded. The fight was intense. Luffy was both fighting effortlessly yet protecting Nami who had his back. Zoro and Robin were like the perfect team and Lily felt utter relief being protected by Sanji who proved to be an awesome sexy fighter.

It seemed to be going fine until a sneaky marine had snuck up on Sanji had sliced his arm up badly. Lily cried out but was too late to warn her fiancee. Sanji grimaced, turned and kicked his attacker with ease but blood poured from his wound. Lily saw with horror another Marine about to take advantage of Sanji's Distraction,. Without thinking Lily grabbed a sword from the floor and amazingly fended off the attack. Sanji looked awed and in love at her skill. Lily realised then she couldn't sit back and ran into the fray.

The overwhelming odds which had started to look too much were now turning in the Strawhats favour. Lily found to her own amazement that she was a skilled swordfighter. It was like she had trained for years. But despite her wicked fighting skills the Marines were still blocking the Thousand Sunny. Luffy was about to call a charge when cannon fire exploded into the air and not from one of the Marines. From out of the mists came Shank's ship and within less then half an hour he had decimated the Marine fleet.

"You're my father?" Lily asked the man once he boarded their ship. He smiled back at her, slightly teary in the eye.

"Lily. My sweet Lily. Yes I am. I missed you so much baby"

And then he was crying all over her.

"You look so much like your mother." He wept

"I do" she asked

"Yes. She was a beautiful mermaid but then a cruel twist of fate and she died from an illnes just after giving birth to you. I knew that the mermaids wouldn't care for a half human child and I couldn't keep you safe so I sent you away. The Marines were already after me."

Wow, Lily though. I'm half mermaid. That was so cool. But then she was sad as the fact her mother died sank in. The renuin was brief but Shanks promised to see her again on her wedding day,.

Fast forward three months and Sanji and Lily got married. Luffy and Nami also got married the same day and it was a fantastic wedding celebration. Zoro had proposed to Robin at the after party. Lily enjoyhed many adventures with the Starwhats and eventually helped Luffy find the One Piece and become King of the pirates. She herself made her own name as Princess of the Pirates. Becoming the most powerful female pirate of all time.

And the others lived happily too and at some point whilst Lily was enjoying her adventures Law had found his own OC love and they to lived hapily ever after.

And then someone with a devil fruit power to reverse time appeared and Lily got to repeat her adventures over and over where Ace didn't die and Sabo was there. And they eneded up as a male couple. Oh and Lily and Sanji's daughter met up with Luffy and Nami's son and Robin and Zoro's twin boy and girl and had OC adventures of their own . And Doflomingo had a sad backstory and there were vampires and someone had went into an alternatie universe where it was a high school and they had a sex change and some boring romance drama happened and writer really has stop bother to try anymore and just thinking up of overused clichés in the fandom to fill up space with. Oh and some slice of stuff and Luffy, Ace and Sabo suddenly had a younger sister. Ok that's enough now. Writer is tired.

The End

P.N This is just me taking every cliché I hate in One Piece Fandom and trying to make light of it. It was meant to be decently written but I quickly got to the point where I got bored of trying to do things right and just thought, to hell with it, let's just write what comes into my head. Yes there is bashing in this story. But I have tried to take it at the most superficial level. Please keep writing what you love. I may not be the type of audience you are aiming for but I'm sure others enjoy it but most importantly that the writer is enjoying it. The great thing about Fanfiction is the Fan part of it.


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